Celebrating and Appreciating Moms

By the time you read this, Mother’s Day, the one day we set aside each year to honor Moms will be in the rearview mirror.  The leftovers will have been eaten, the flowers a tad more wilted, and all that will remain are the hopefully fond memories of another Mother’s Day in the books.

But why do we celebrate Moms? And just as importantly, how do we keep that gratitude for all our moms do, happening year round, and not just show up for Mom on one Hallmark calendar day of the year.

Some of the things I appreciate most about my own, now 90 year old Mother is her sass and tenacity.  She showed me what hard work and grit looked like.  Always determined to meet the goal, whatever it was.  In my case, it meant often working two jobs so she could support the two of us as I was growing up.

As an adult, I still admire her tenacity. At 90, she still lives at home, still drives, and seems to be coping well with the inevitable challenges of growing older. 

I am grateful to come from a long line of strong women and to see my own daughters be tenacious and determined in their pursuits as well.   

Aside from the characteristic of tenacity, is matters of the heart.  I experienced my mom and still do as someone who’d give you her last dollar if you needed it.  Her big heart and kindness are things I will always appreciate about her.

I also feel incredibly grateful to be a mom.  To know the joys of giving birth and raising humans -and it is not lost on me that not every woman who desires that is able to have it.

Having my own kids is the reason I get to celebrate Mother’s Day, and I am grateful.

Of course there are challenges in being a Mom, as there is with any important role and responsibility.

From the time our children are born we wonder, am I doing it right?  There’s the emotional battle with too many moms about staying home with their young children or working outside the home and often guilt over either choice.

For Moms that became a mom too young, too soon, who were not prepared… that presents  its own challenges for some.

Moms that have lost children may still be grieving and those moms need special care and lots of love. This is true whether the child was lost by miscarriage, abortion, death or having your child taken away.

Those of us blessed to raise our children and see them become adults know that we got many things right, but we didn’t get everything right.  There will always be things we wish we did differently.

So perhaps this week, Moms take some time to be reflective. Contemplative. Appreciative.

With the celebration behind us, we can take this time to appreciate we  did the best we could with what we knew at the time.  Show yourself some grace and compassion.

None of us get it just right. So lean into the messiness of being a mom, the pain at times of being a mom, and the minute by minute joys of being a mom.  Remind yourself that you have this one precious present moment.  Let go of the “shoulds”, the negative doubts, and embrace that you are showing up, have showed up and continue to show up for your kids, be they young or all grown up.

 And remember to celebrate you. All that you’ve learned and experienced in one of the most amazing journeys that life can provide. That of guiding another human from birth and beyond.

And if you still have a mom, don’t wait ‘til the next Mother’s Day to celebrate her!  Be sure that you provide her with words of appreciation.  Let her know that she is seen and she matters. Check in with her and spend time with her- for that is the greatest gift you can give back to her.

Here’s to all the moms… the birth moms, adoptive moms, foster moms, step moms, grandmom’s and all those who have stepped into mom roles when it really mattered!