Are you one of those people- the kind where every holiday gathering has to be just right? The right decorations, and the right menu and the house must be clean within an inch of it’s life? Are you that person who has so much anxiety about everything being just right that you have forgotten how to enjoy the holidays? It can be enormously difficult for some people to embrace what is; anything less than perfect can feel unbearable. Where did this drive for perfection come from a

The calendar reminds us once a year on a Thursday late in November that it’s time to gather around family or friends. With some kind of stuffed bird as the centerpiece, we pause our busy lives to spend time with those we love. We shut down work, gather around an overflowing table of traditional foods we eagerly await, and pause to give thanks in between the stuffing of food and perhaps raucous conversation. We have this day set aside for expressing gratitude, food, fun and fr

The holidays are upon us. While some of us embrace the opportunities for family, food, football and fun, others approach the holidays with increased stress and trepidation at the mere thought of being around extended family.  For many, family is fraught with difficulty.  Whether you have an aunt, who passively aggressively asks why you are still single, or the drunken uncle that can't seem to hold his liquor, the struggles are real in many families. As the saying goes  you ca

How often have you heard your internal voice screaming, " you idiot, what did you do that for?"  How many times do you experience having a big emotional reaction that surprised even you? And then your inner voice begins to berate you for having that big reaction.  That voice might sound something like, "why couldn't you keep your self under better control?" How often have you found yourself criticizing someone else who dared to have an opinion that was different from yours?