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Writer's pictureLesli Dullum Tutterrow

Selling vs. Relationshipping

Selling is not a bad word, though many think of it that way. While there are many who sell for a living who operate with integrity, we all know or have met some that don’t.


Are you an organization that is only about the numbers? You know what I mean. Every weekly meeting consists of who had the most sales, the biggest percentage increase, who made the most money for the company that week or month…


While the numbers tell a story, they don’t tell the whole story, and they certainly only provide a snapshot of what is really going on in your business.

Because in the end, it is people serving and helping people, or it’s not. When it’s ONLY all about the immediate sale, the numbers may go up, but the likelihood of a repeat sale goes down. This is because the person who bought from the salesperson who is only concerned about “their numbers” will likely feel that they are a number during the transaction.


A person who feels cared for, who experiences a caring salesperson that is invested in a trusting relationship- one where the person feels like the salesperson truly is interested in helping them out and serving them, creates a relationship. And relationships (or as I like to call it “relationshipping”)is where we can shine, be helpful, present, and consider that the person who is counting on us for information is also counting on us to steer them in the most helpful direction to solve their need for a product or service.


Relationshipping is felt by the person who experiences the salesperson. Relationshipping conveys that the customer or client is cared about and for- they matter, not just their wallet.

People often instinctively know when someone is “out for the sale” because their words, body language and demeanor give that information away.

When you genuinely care for people and want to help them solve a problem- that is also conveyed by words, body language and tone, along with a willingness to ask more questions and perhaps spend more time to get it right for that customer or client.

In the end, when we take the time to show up as humans who truly care for people and want to help them, the money tends to come as a side benefit of doing your job well.


Are you a boss / business owner who is putting undue pressure on your team to make the sales and “get the numbers up” or are you one who understands that if you put people first, the profits will come as a result?


Today, rethink how you approach sales in your store or business. Consider ways to train and empower your staff to engage in more relationshipping and serving your customers in ways that naturally cause them to come back for more.


Consider investing in a business coach or consultant who can assist you with this if you have made the decision to change your culture but don’t know where or how to start.


You can focus on people and profits with a different mindset and new tools to equip your people for success in the short run and the long run. Start looking for more than just a snapshot of your numbers. There is a bigger picture to see.


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